Summary
Excerpt
Review
The sequel to the bestselling VGL Male Seeks Same!
Poor Ethan Schwartz. He’s just had the most shocking news a gay man can get: he’s been diagnosed HIV positive. Up until today, he thought his life was on a perfect course: he had a job he loved and something else he thought he’d never have: a new man, one whom Ethan thought of as “the one.” The one who would complete him, who would take his life from a lonely existence to a place filled with laughter, hot sex, and romance.
But along with the fateful diagnosis comes another shock: who is this new love? Had Ethan ever really known him? And did he infect him? As Ethan says, his love history had been more of a haiku than an epic and Brian, his new love, seems to the likely culprit is his newfound diagnosis.
The course of true love never runs smoothly, right? And for Ethan and Brian, their new love, once so bright and shining, now appears tinged with darkness and deceit. Can they face this hurdle together with honesty and forgiveness? Or will this revelation tear them apart?
Ethan turns to creating a blog, Off to See the Wizard of Poz to help him deal with his diagnosis and love troubles. And finds there just may be more hope and support in the world than he once believed. And one of his blog readers just might have the key to Ethan’s happily ever after.
It’s only been a couple of days since my doctor broke the news and told me I was HIV positive. After the initial shock wore off, I wanted to jump up and point an accusing finger at the Doc, shouting, “Hey buddy, you got the wrong guy!”
I couldn’t be HIV positive. Not me. Not a gay man whose sexual history read more like a haiku than an epic.
Not me. Not a gay guy in his forties, pathetically involved in his first real love affair. Not me. This love affair that I talk about had seemed like more than “an affair.” No, this relationship had more the ring of future on it.
I thought I had found my soul mate.
I thought we were in a monogamous relationship.
It’s tough enough getting the news that you’re poz. Tougher still to suddenly realize that this news points a very accusing finger at the man you thought you might wind up spending the rest of your life with.
He doesn’t know what I know. Not yet. And maybe he doesn’t even know he’s infected. I’ve thought through the scenarios and he could still be in that “window period” you’ve heard tell about. That still doesn’t make me feel any better.
Why? Because he either knowingly infected me or unwittingly did so, with the very likely possibility that he was fucking other guys behind my back.
Neither of these possibilities is pretty to contemplate.
I can’t talk to him right now. I can’t trust myself not to A) break down into a snotty-nosed, sobbing mess or B) kill him.
Neither of those would solve much. So, for now, I keep my own counsel. It’s just you and me. Are you listening?
Before I decide what I will do about him, I have to take care of me first. And that means drawing this first blog to a close, and heading out to pay a visit to my friendly neighborhood pharmacist. He’s got a gift bag for me: two expensive drugs called Viramune and Truvada.
Yes, folks, the guy who never smoked, never did drugs, and whose throat is still only on an acquaintance basis with hooch is about to become a habitual drug user.
God save us all.
In the sequel to VGL Male Seeks Same, Ethan gets the life changing diagnosis that he is now HIV positive. From the initial panic to his rage at the believed culprit, his boyfriend of six months Brian, this story is a journey into the terrifying and eye-opening world of a newly diagnosed HIV positive gay man. Ethan eventually turns to the anonymity of the Internet and blog writing to help him work out the conflicting emotions within himself. But will this help Ethan?
One of the best aspects of Reed’s book is his unpredictability. Nothing is sacred and every possible topic can be tackled. Here the author takes the happy ever after ending from his first book and turns it on its head when one of the characters is suddenly HIV positive. From the panic at his initial diagnosis to understanding medication and costs, this emotional story shows the scary and realistic aspects often overlooked when HIV changes someone’s life. Well written with an intensity to the prose, this wonderful story shows the positive and negative elements associated with the first brush of HIV while showing it’s not the death sentence it used to be and happy endings are still possible.
The story is told in third person point of view from Ethan’s perspective, delving into his panic as his mind whirls about how this was possible and where he could have been infected. Of course his mind lands on his boyfriend–Brian–and recent unprotected sex they’d had. In those moments of passion, trusting in monogamy and relative health, the ease to forgo protection is an all too common occurrence. The need to blame is understandable as Ethan reels from the news and struggles with the changes in his life and what it means for his relationship with Brian. The relatable and emotion filled scenes are honest and relevant as the immediate impact on Ethan’s life is clear.
Ethan turns to writing a blog as a way to express his overwhelming feelings of confusion, betrayal, and sadness. Within his blog he tackles important issues as they come up for him from the incredibly high cost of drugs (because really your life is worth any cost it demands) to his confusion over his relationship with Brian. The blog is therapy for Ethan allows him to pour out his emotions in raw form and accept impartial feedback. The comments are all supportive, but show that not everyone changes their thinking or actions even if they sympathize with Ethan’s plight.
One of the points the author tries to convey through the blog is the casual cruelty used in online dating sites to segregate potential partners by HIV status. The common use of the term NEG UB2, which refers to the negative HIV status of the poster wanting someone also HIV negative, immediately sets apart an entire group of people. While the fear of such a life-changing virus is a real concern, Ethan reflects on the importance to look beyond medical status to the person. How those without HIV can be in a safe relationship with someone with HIV. Just as the first book reflected attitudes in online dating, this sequel highlights the further segregation that goes on within the gay population.
Even though Ethan doesn’t identify how he got infected, whether the virus had lain dormant within his body or he contracted it from Brian, he learns to look beyond the how to what it means for his life and relationship. In a particularly poignant internal commentary, Ethan muses:
“Love was based on faith, and faith was really nothing more than hope, something indescribable and real in our hearts. And certainly not something that could be quantified or proven beyond a reasonable doubt.”
While Ethan’s life has changed overnight and he may always have unanswered questions, he also learns he doesn’t have to be alone and he can have a happy and hopefully long life with someone he loves. You don’t have to be gay or HIV positive to understand and relate to the concepts and ideas presented within this story and thus the appeal will span across a wide variety of readers. The important topics presented in this well crafted, emotional, and passionate story will linger well past the end of the book.
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